When a close grandparent dies, the grandchild often feels like they've lost someone akin to a parent which is intensely painful and can cause many difficult secondary losses. Many grandchildren have very close relationships with their grandparents and rely on them for a number of their social, emotional, or physical needs. With such differences, grandparent/grandchild relationships obviously run the spectrum from ' you-are-like-a-parent-to-me' type relationships to ' see-you-next-Christmas' type relationships. Your grandparent might have been more like a parent.įamilies differ in their closeness, hierarchy, proximity, relationships, and overall dynamics. Also, your parent's generation may set the tone for how they want your grandparent's death acknowledged and grieved, which may be different from how you would like to cope. If any of this is true for you, you may have to work extra hard to balance your needs with the needs of others.ģ. Heightened emotion, grieving styles, misunderstandings, even fighting can make it hard for people to (1) support one another and (2) attend to their own needs. It would be ideal if all families could grieve together, however, we know that they often do not. Rather I think it means that when we all grieve together - when we share our sadnesses, our fears, and our joyful memories - we are ultimately able to give and receive more support and comfort than if we were to grieve alone. Personally, I think the word "divided" is a little misleading because I don't think the proverb is meant to imply that anyone's grief is any less. There is a proverb that says " Grief divided is made lighter". Depending on the circumstances, you may feel as though you have to prioritize the needs of others in your family before attending to your own grief and wellbeing. A grandparent's death is often felt very deeply by many members of your family. The death of any family member can have an impact on the family as a whole.
Your parents, aunts, uncles, siblings, and cousins might be grieving as well. If you are a young adult who's recently experienced a death of any kind, check out the post: How do I find support as a grieving 20-something? 2. 10 Comprehensive Tips for Talking to Children About Death.Supporting a Grieving Child: The importance of modeling.Childhood Grief: The influence of age on understanding.If you're worried about a bereaved child or young adult check out the following posts: Although grief is always individual, age can influence a person's understanding and response to loss. Experiencing the death of a loved one for the first time can be confusing and scary and can lead to questions about death, death related rituals, and grief. With such an age difference, many people experience the death of at least one of their grandparents in childhood or early adulthood and for many, this will be their first experience with loss. On average, there are about 47+ years between grandparent and grandchild. This may be your first experience with death. Although your grief will ultimately be unique to you and to the relationship you had with your grandparent, in the following article we will discuss a few of challenges common to grieving the death of a grandparent.
You will likely experience the death of at least one grandparent in your lifetime and, when you do, it may cause intense pain and heartache. Grieving an Older Adult, Grieving a Grandparent
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